Are you feeling the pressure as summer draws to a close and life ramps back up? Here are some tips to deal with a very stressful time of the year.
For some of us the beginning of September is filled with shopping and coping as we, or our children, head back to school. This can be somewhat of a relief, but, at the same time can present challenges for you and your kids. Everyone can end up stressed out.
Fo some this is simply a time when the “let it slide” attitude of summer is replaced by tight deadlines.Whatever the case may be most of us are taking on more.
One of the things that can really help is remembering that you were able to handle life before the summer. Look at your schedule and see where some “useless” time slipped in. Reclaim that time now, as your schedule gets more intense.
How did your pre-summer schedule work for you? Look for things that could be improved. Can your life run more efficiently? Take this opportunity to get back into the swing of things in a healthier, more productive, way.
You may discover that your schedule needs a complete overhaul. Re-thinking it will consume some time. It will also get you focused on the things that are really important. Organizing your life will always help you release the stress.
Make your improved schedule about priorities. Be honest about what need to get done. Start with the big chunks first. How much time to you need to allocate to your job? How much for school and other non-negotiable commitments? Your family? Never forget to get some time in there for self-care, exercise, meditation, yoga, whatever you do to keep stress levels at a minimum. Once you have the big ticket items dealt with you can develop a base schedule that will save you time every day.
Don’t sweat the details. You’re better off dealing with them at the start of your day. Each morning, or maybe the night before, make a list of the big ticket items that have to get done, then create a detailed task list for the day. Then, all you have to do is work the plan. Remember to be flexible. Build in some time for the unexpected.
Before you know it you’ll be back in the swing of things, getting stuff done, and finding some time for yourself that you didn’t think you had. Do you find this time of year challenging? I’d love to hear why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Truths to Live By: No fear
In this post we’ll explore fear, where it comes from and how it has been used to control you. In our benevolent Universe Ifa tells us that there is no need to fear.
Fear is a basic animal impulse. It is the flight side of the fight or flight response. It prepares us to run from predators. When you are being chased across the savannah by a lion, fear is very useful. When fear is used to keep people in line, it is dis-empowering. It can rob us of will and compromise our destinies.
Pain and difficulty are part of life. We can neither deny, nor avoid them. They are often a source of dread. We must learn not to fear the unpleasantness of life. Misfortune and difficulty are temporary.
Look at challenging times with a longer-term perspective. The Universe is always sending us exactly what we need in order to fulfill our destinies. The more quickly that we can embrace the lessons, the easier it will be for us to move on. Accept hardships because they bring growth.
Our other great fear is death. The Yoruba did not fear death. They understood that this realm is simply a place that we visit. Our natural state is boundless, timeless, energy. We are here for experiences that can only be had by limiting ourselves.
Our culture is obsessed with youth. We under-value the wisdom we develop as we grow older. We do not understand the different roles that we play as we move through our lives.
Fear of growing is the most illogical of all human fears. We all chose to be here. That choice included growing old, and dying. The loss of youth, the wrinkles, body fat and everything else that comes with it, is balanced by maturity, wisdom and spiritual insight. We should do everything we can to stay healthy so that we can live long productive lives. The pointless pursuit of youthfulness in not helpful to our growth.
Have you made a journey out of fear? How has it been for you? Do you believe that we are meant to live without fear? I’d love to hear why or why not.
Connect with Brian
Fear is a basic animal impulse. It is the flight side of the fight or flight response. It prepares us to run from predators. When you are being chased across the savannah by a lion, fear is very useful. When fear is used to keep people in line, it is dis-empowering. It can rob us of will and compromise our destinies.
Pain and difficulty are part of life. We can neither deny, nor avoid them. They are often a source of dread. We must learn not to fear the unpleasantness of life. Misfortune and difficulty are temporary.
Look at challenging times with a longer-term perspective. The Universe is always sending us exactly what we need in order to fulfill our destinies. The more quickly that we can embrace the lessons, the easier it will be for us to move on. Accept hardships because they bring growth.
Our other great fear is death. The Yoruba did not fear death. They understood that this realm is simply a place that we visit. Our natural state is boundless, timeless, energy. We are here for experiences that can only be had by limiting ourselves.
Our culture is obsessed with youth. We under-value the wisdom we develop as we grow older. We do not understand the different roles that we play as we move through our lives.
Fear of growing is the most illogical of all human fears. We all chose to be here. That choice included growing old, and dying. The loss of youth, the wrinkles, body fat and everything else that comes with it, is balanced by maturity, wisdom and spiritual insight. We should do everything we can to stay healthy so that we can live long productive lives. The pointless pursuit of youthfulness in not helpful to our growth.
Have you made a journey out of fear? How has it been for you? Do you believe that we are meant to live without fear? I’d love to hear why or why not.
Connect with Brian
Monday, August 27, 2012
When Friendships are Over
There comes a time in any relationship when we must ask ourselves if the other person belongs in our lives. I was inspired to write this by a post on one of my favourite blogs. The topic was “unfriending” people in the real world. It is something that I’ve often struggled with.
People grow and change. Along with the shifts come new perspectives, new ideas, and a deeper and more profound dedication to good character. At some point we will all have a friendship that doesn’t fit.
Let’s look at friendship from the perspective of character. Maintaining good character is not easy. One of the most difficult parts is dealing with others’ bad behaviour.
If you start to feel uncomfortable with someone it is important to look at why. Once you have understood the reason, take a good look at yourself. Sometimes the “bad” we see in other people is about issues inside ourselves.
If you discover that you have some work to do, take care of it. Explore yourself with openness and acceptance. Let the friendship ride for a while. When you’ve dealt with your issues its time to take a serious look at the other person.
Part of good character is not tolerating bad character form others. I let a close friend go a few years ago. They were always kind and respectful to me, but, their behaviour towards the other people was terrible. As I pulled back I started to receive the same treatment so many others had. It was no longer possible for me to remain in that friendship.
How you handle the “breakup” is a tough question. In the early stages of a friendship, just let the relationship fade. Once you have a closer bond its best to address your concerns. There is always hope for change. Be prepared to get shot down. If they resist simply make your point then let things be. Allowing the relationship to end naturally is the best course of action. If they won’t let go tell them you aren’t willing to have them in your life anymore.
If they are open discuss how you’ve seen the behaviour play out, then be willing to help them work on it. Be open to feedback they may have about your own issues. Work on things together.
Have you ever struggled to let go of a friend. How did it go for you? Were you happy with the result? I’m interested to know why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
Check out Craig Harper's inspiring post.
People grow and change. Along with the shifts come new perspectives, new ideas, and a deeper and more profound dedication to good character. At some point we will all have a friendship that doesn’t fit.
Let’s look at friendship from the perspective of character. Maintaining good character is not easy. One of the most difficult parts is dealing with others’ bad behaviour.
If you start to feel uncomfortable with someone it is important to look at why. Once you have understood the reason, take a good look at yourself. Sometimes the “bad” we see in other people is about issues inside ourselves.
If you discover that you have some work to do, take care of it. Explore yourself with openness and acceptance. Let the friendship ride for a while. When you’ve dealt with your issues its time to take a serious look at the other person.
Part of good character is not tolerating bad character form others. I let a close friend go a few years ago. They were always kind and respectful to me, but, their behaviour towards the other people was terrible. As I pulled back I started to receive the same treatment so many others had. It was no longer possible for me to remain in that friendship.
How you handle the “breakup” is a tough question. In the early stages of a friendship, just let the relationship fade. Once you have a closer bond its best to address your concerns. There is always hope for change. Be prepared to get shot down. If they resist simply make your point then let things be. Allowing the relationship to end naturally is the best course of action. If they won’t let go tell them you aren’t willing to have them in your life anymore.
If they are open discuss how you’ve seen the behaviour play out, then be willing to help them work on it. Be open to feedback they may have about your own issues. Work on things together.
Have you ever struggled to let go of a friend. How did it go for you? Were you happy with the result? I’m interested to know why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
Check out Craig Harper's inspiring post.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Turths to live by: The Benevolent Universe
What we believe forms the foundation of our life. Are your beliefs making your life better? Supportive beliefs form the basis for a good life. One of the toughest shifts is moving out of fear. The sixteen truths of Ifa can help you move from fear to confidence.
In Ifa we believe that the Universe is benevolent and was created by a benevolent God. The natural world provides the evidence. Everything works in a seamless, perfect, order. At times, life is challenging for many species, but, life is sustained and continues.
Things become more complicated when we look at human beings. We live on a perfect self-polluting, self-healing planet. It seems that we are making a mess of it. Our viability as a species is at stake. Whenever we have grown from one level of consciousness to the next we have faced this kind of crisis.
We are taught that we are imperfect, that we are born in sin, that while each of us contains a spark of the divine we must avoid temptation or face hell. These rules used to be necessary. They provided structure and overcame barbarism. Today, they serve to undermine growth. We are unable to take responsibility for our own lives. They leave us unhappy, fearful, and incapable of evolving.
If we assume that God is a benevolent consciousness, if we choose to believe that we are an inseparable part of God, then we are able to seek joy, work to better ourselves, and become protectors of our lovely planet. We can position ourselves as part of the perfection that we see all around us. We can strive to become more, to evolve, to care for ourselves, other human beings, and the Universe that we are part of.
In this almost limitless realm of experience, what we choose to believe becomes our reality. If you decide that God is benevolent the world will become a better place for you. It is the best possible choice. Do you experience the Universe as benevolent? I’d love to know why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
In Ifa we believe that the Universe is benevolent and was created by a benevolent God. The natural world provides the evidence. Everything works in a seamless, perfect, order. At times, life is challenging for many species, but, life is sustained and continues.
Things become more complicated when we look at human beings. We live on a perfect self-polluting, self-healing planet. It seems that we are making a mess of it. Our viability as a species is at stake. Whenever we have grown from one level of consciousness to the next we have faced this kind of crisis.
We are taught that we are imperfect, that we are born in sin, that while each of us contains a spark of the divine we must avoid temptation or face hell. These rules used to be necessary. They provided structure and overcame barbarism. Today, they serve to undermine growth. We are unable to take responsibility for our own lives. They leave us unhappy, fearful, and incapable of evolving.
If we assume that God is a benevolent consciousness, if we choose to believe that we are an inseparable part of God, then we are able to seek joy, work to better ourselves, and become protectors of our lovely planet. We can position ourselves as part of the perfection that we see all around us. We can strive to become more, to evolve, to care for ourselves, other human beings, and the Universe that we are part of.
In this almost limitless realm of experience, what we choose to believe becomes our reality. If you decide that God is benevolent the world will become a better place for you. It is the best possible choice. Do you experience the Universe as benevolent? I’d love to know why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Stressful summer?
Is summer creating stress for you? Don’t worry. You’re not alone. As the beautiful weather hits the northern hemisphere, patios are filling with locals and tourists. It sounds idyllic. The sudden rush to do things can make this season challenging.
If you are a parent you are dealing with children who need to be occupied when they aren’t in school. Everyone’s social schedule has gone into over-drive. You are pushing hard to meet pre-vacation deadlines. You are eating more, drinking more, and likely getting less sleep.
It is possible for fun to be stressful. Like everything else enjoyment must be kept in balance. Our time in the sun is short. People feel pressured to get as much time outside as possible before the seasons turn. I just finished a two week period without a single free evening. It’s been a good time,but, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed.
What to do? Take stock of your schedule. Understanding the commitments you have can help put things in perspective. Figure out how much time is already spoken for. Don’t forget to set aside time for the things that replenish you. Moving your exercise routine outside can really help. It is a perfect way to feel like you’re not missing out while taking care of yourself.
Now that you know how much time s spoken for. Take some time to think about what you’d like to do with what’s left. Even if you are in a relationship, or have a family, do this on your own first. Be honest. Write it down. If you’re on your own. You’re done. Execute your plan and be flexible enough to accept social invitations if they appeal to you.
If there is someone else in the picture it’s time to negotiate. Set the stage by finding the things you both want to do. That way you’re starting on a positive note. Then, start looking at the priorities you both have, Do you both need some alone-time to enjoy the good weather? Take it. Fairly allocate whatever is left so that everyone feels honoured and supported. Appreciate your partner’s willingness to do things for you by reciprocating. Say no to social invitations that you would rather not accept.
Keeping your time under control is always one of the best ways to de-stress. This social time of the year is one of the best to learn how to keep things in balance by saying no. Is summer stressing you out? Let me know why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
If you are a parent you are dealing with children who need to be occupied when they aren’t in school. Everyone’s social schedule has gone into over-drive. You are pushing hard to meet pre-vacation deadlines. You are eating more, drinking more, and likely getting less sleep.
It is possible for fun to be stressful. Like everything else enjoyment must be kept in balance. Our time in the sun is short. People feel pressured to get as much time outside as possible before the seasons turn. I just finished a two week period without a single free evening. It’s been a good time,but, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed.
What to do? Take stock of your schedule. Understanding the commitments you have can help put things in perspective. Figure out how much time is already spoken for. Don’t forget to set aside time for the things that replenish you. Moving your exercise routine outside can really help. It is a perfect way to feel like you’re not missing out while taking care of yourself.
Now that you know how much time s spoken for. Take some time to think about what you’d like to do with what’s left. Even if you are in a relationship, or have a family, do this on your own first. Be honest. Write it down. If you’re on your own. You’re done. Execute your plan and be flexible enough to accept social invitations if they appeal to you.
If there is someone else in the picture it’s time to negotiate. Set the stage by finding the things you both want to do. That way you’re starting on a positive note. Then, start looking at the priorities you both have, Do you both need some alone-time to enjoy the good weather? Take it. Fairly allocate whatever is left so that everyone feels honoured and supported. Appreciate your partner’s willingness to do things for you by reciprocating. Say no to social invitations that you would rather not accept.
Keeping your time under control is always one of the best ways to de-stress. This social time of the year is one of the best to learn how to keep things in balance by saying no. Is summer stressing you out? Let me know why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Being You: Why does it matter?
For the past several weeks we’ve been exploring different personality types. These types come from the ancient African philosophy, Ifa. I hope you’ve enjoyed the posts. Exploring the archetypes is interesting. It can give you insights into why people work the way they do.
Seeing yourself reflected in the guardians can be very affirming and freeing. It is also important to find balance while honouring your essence. When we accept our own way of moving through the world, we are empowered to build a life based on our deepest values. We can live in a way that supports our purpose. For some it inspires a journey of self-discovery. For others it gives an encouraging push in the right direction.
Seeing other personalities reflected in the archetypes can help you appreciate other people. You can understand those who are the most different from you. As you read the posts I hope you were able to recognize some of your friends and family in the descriptions. Perhaps you to became more at ease with traits that you may have found disturbing before.
Just as nature maintains balance, the Universe balances our species. The different qualities of the Guardian Energies are there for a reason. They are a brilliant expressions of human diversity. The diversity that has made us a successful species.
Today we face global crises that need our focus. We have to use all of the resources available from these different types if we are going to make the changes that we need to. Together we can work towards a healthy happy world for the future.
There are some less common types that are starting to emerge more regularly now. If you know someone who hasn’t fit the mold I’ve presented so far, let me know. I’d love to explore it with you. Perhaps you’re even one of the exotic types yourself.
Connect with Brian
Seeing yourself reflected in the guardians can be very affirming and freeing. It is also important to find balance while honouring your essence. When we accept our own way of moving through the world, we are empowered to build a life based on our deepest values. We can live in a way that supports our purpose. For some it inspires a journey of self-discovery. For others it gives an encouraging push in the right direction.
Seeing other personalities reflected in the archetypes can help you appreciate other people. You can understand those who are the most different from you. As you read the posts I hope you were able to recognize some of your friends and family in the descriptions. Perhaps you to became more at ease with traits that you may have found disturbing before.
Just as nature maintains balance, the Universe balances our species. The different qualities of the Guardian Energies are there for a reason. They are a brilliant expressions of human diversity. The diversity that has made us a successful species.
Today we face global crises that need our focus. We have to use all of the resources available from these different types if we are going to make the changes that we need to. Together we can work towards a healthy happy world for the future.
There are some less common types that are starting to emerge more regularly now. If you know someone who hasn’t fit the mold I’ve presented so far, let me know. I’d love to explore it with you. Perhaps you’re even one of the exotic types yourself.
Connect with Brian
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Being You: Do you create order out of chaos?
Do you need order? Times of chaos can bring us the most potential. Striving to organize the world is a great goal, but, f you go too far you could compromise on your growth. Change is a necessary part of life. The disorder that accompanies it is often the hardest part. See the potential before you start organizing. Get into the driver’s seat.
That helpful person who just organized your spices is probably a child of Oko. Oko’s can seem obsessive. They are all about organizing. They can find order in unlikely places. They can protect with a scorpion-like sting.
Do you know someone who can effortlessly keep their busy world organized? They are always seeing better ways to structure things. They make plans and can explode if their plans aren’t followed. They can see the inherent order in the madness of life. You have just encountered a child of Oko. Perhaps you are one yourself.
Many people focus on the dangerous scorpion-sting of this energy. It is really about creating order. It can be hard to keep your temper in check when everything you’ve worked to create is under threat. Okos need to learn that chaos is necessary so that higher orders can emerge.
The flow of things is constantly interrupted. The cycles are crucial for life to evolve. As an Oko your drive to make sense of your world can be hard to contain. Find peace in times of chaos to discover the most opportune moment to reinstate order. Then, your world will function at higher and higher levels. You can get things organized and thoroughly planned. You can show us all how to keep our projects and our lives running smoothly.
I love the Okos in my life for their focus and their ability to see the inherent order in any system. They are excited to get you organized. It can be hard to get them to ease up as they dive into your closets, junk drawers, and even the back seat of your car. Their passion for ordering your world can be intimidating and amusing. It is always meant as a gift. If you need help getting rid of the clutter, a child of Oko can help. If you’re having trouble making sense of what’s going on around you an Oko can see the patterns and help you find your way.
Have you ever see an Oko passionately defending their need for order? Did you try to join in to get a better understanding? Perhaps you think you are an Oko yourself. I’d love to hear why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
That helpful person who just organized your spices is probably a child of Oko. Oko’s can seem obsessive. They are all about organizing. They can find order in unlikely places. They can protect with a scorpion-like sting.
Do you know someone who can effortlessly keep their busy world organized? They are always seeing better ways to structure things. They make plans and can explode if their plans aren’t followed. They can see the inherent order in the madness of life. You have just encountered a child of Oko. Perhaps you are one yourself.
Many people focus on the dangerous scorpion-sting of this energy. It is really about creating order. It can be hard to keep your temper in check when everything you’ve worked to create is under threat. Okos need to learn that chaos is necessary so that higher orders can emerge.
The flow of things is constantly interrupted. The cycles are crucial for life to evolve. As an Oko your drive to make sense of your world can be hard to contain. Find peace in times of chaos to discover the most opportune moment to reinstate order. Then, your world will function at higher and higher levels. You can get things organized and thoroughly planned. You can show us all how to keep our projects and our lives running smoothly.
I love the Okos in my life for their focus and their ability to see the inherent order in any system. They are excited to get you organized. It can be hard to get them to ease up as they dive into your closets, junk drawers, and even the back seat of your car. Their passion for ordering your world can be intimidating and amusing. It is always meant as a gift. If you need help getting rid of the clutter, a child of Oko can help. If you’re having trouble making sense of what’s going on around you an Oko can see the patterns and help you find your way.
Have you ever see an Oko passionately defending their need for order? Did you try to join in to get a better understanding? Perhaps you think you are an Oko yourself. I’d love to hear why, or why not.
Connect with Brian
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)