Is it time to revamp your routine?

I’ve been thinking about a challenging couple of weeks I had this summer. We were starting a renovation and so had to move out of our space for a few months. Moving is always stressful. We had several places that things need to be moved to, both temporarily and permanently. That added some additional stress. The renovation is complete and I’ve settled back in at home.

Settling in to a new space is always the hardest part for me. I can handle the physical demands of the move pretty well but being in a new space is very disorienting. My routines get shaken up. Even my walk to work was completely different, adding its own level of challenge to my day.

It really got me thinking about routine and how easy it is for us to get stuck in a rut. As difficult as this transition period was, the challenge allowed me to integrate life in a brand new way. It was an opportunity to clean house. I looked at some things that may not support the bigger picture of my life.

From how my clothes are stored to the way I get back and forth from home to office; even having my car stored a long walk way from where I live created shifts in my everyday lifestyle. All of these things shifted the way that I move through the world. I reevaluated things when we moved back home. The old habits were broken and that the fragile new routine disappeared too. The move back was another opportunity to revamp my routine and my experience of day to day life. I’ve moved into a life that more closely reflects who I really am.

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Coping with Change

We all know that managing change is a necessary thing in our lives. The pace of change is accelerating. We all need ways to deal with our ever shifting world.

There are many ways to deal with change. For the spiritual person, change is a road-sign on the path. Spiritual traditions around the world have always challenged their members to embrace change. We must face the changes in our lives with grace. Impermanence is part of our journey. Why would we have chosen to come into physical existence unless we needed that lesson? We are here to learn to deal with impermanence, in all its forms, including our mortality.

We are faced with another kind of challenge as we progress spiritually in our modern lives. We must take care not use our need to cope with change as another way to numb ourselves to life. It is easy for us to allow ourselves to become distracted by the next best thing, by the news about escalating political and environmental crises, by the very speed of the shifts that we are going through.

To deal with any unbalancing experience, spirit asks us to slow down. Sit in the midst of the chaos. Allow the winds of change to blow as we observe quietly form the centre of the storm. There is nothing essentially different about the changes that are happening now. They are just happening faster than they have before. We are the first generation to see things spinning this fast. It is important to embrace the lessons these shifts bring. Engage spiritually and find your place in the calm at the centre of the global shifts so that you can clearly see the path you are meant to take in our changing world.

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Am I too Serious?

Am I too serious? This is a questions that you may often ask yourself.  It’s one that many of my clients ask me.  It is important to find balance our in order to have happy, fulfilled lives.

For many of us, taking life, and ourselves, too seriously can be a real problem. Focusing on what’s ahead of us or solving problems can rob us of the joy in simply experiencing our lives in the moment.

We all need periods of hard work, serious thought, relaxation and play. Each of these kinds of activities fulfill and enrich our lives. Our basic natures often lead us more in one direction or another. That is the way we are constructed and it is good to embrace our core by expressing it. It is important to recognize when our default behaviours are working against us.

I tend to over-think things and take everything in life very seriously. My readings often challenge me to do rather than think, to allow life to flow, or to embrace joy. My clients who naturally flow through life are sometimes challenged when hard work, or careful thinking, are needed. It is important to recognize when it’s time to push out of your comfort zone.

Here's an exercise try to figure out your default way of moving through life. Are you a thinker or a doer? Do you flow joyfully or rush from one thing to the next like the wind? Do you hunker down and work hard or plan for the most efficient result? Next time you’re struggling with a problem try the opposite approach. You may be amazed at the results you get. Embrace who you are, but, develop flexibility.  Being able to shift style when you need to will support your own happiness and growth.

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How Important is Health?

In the Ifa philosophy, learning, wisdom and knowledge is most important. They are our chosen destiny. The second most important area is health.

Certainly without health it is impossible to fulfill our destiny. So why wouldn’t it come first?  Many of us choose health challenges as part of our learning and growth. The process of becoming ill and then recovering, or not, can be part of our destiny path.

Maintaining glowing health is a priority unless we need the experience of illness. Let’s assume that we are relatively healthy and that any health crisis we face is meant to be resolved. Achieving and maintaining optimum physical health is based on common sense. Eating well  includes large quantities of vegetables and fruit, whole grains, and healthy protein sources.

Each Guardian Energy implies a certain approach to diet, exercise and ideal weight. For some, spicy food may be a perfect way to keep the body cleansed and functioning well. For others, these foods cause digestive upset and other issues. When you face a health crisis, review your Life Path and Guardian Energy. Deal with the issue appropriately for your matrix.

We can only deal with emotional or spiritual issues once our bodies have been taken care of. Physical health comes first. Once we are in reasonable physical shape then we can start to deal with emotional and spiritual matters.

Spiritual health and emotional well-being support our growth while keeping us in balance. Dealing with our issues, in a way that is appropriate to our matrix, is the key to emotional health. It also requires us to connect more deeply with spirit. Keeping spirit and body in balance is a big part of the job. Too much of either will throw us off course.

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Who Are My Ancestors?

Ancestor worship is a strange idea for most Westerners. It can be the most challenging part of Ifa for us. In Ifa, our ancestors are one of the three pillars we stand on. The other two are the eternal energies of the Universe (known as Orisa) and our Ori (our guide for destiny).

Ifa has a very strict definition of ancestor. An ancestor is a blood relative who has died. No exceptions. I am adopted. After my grandfather’s death I had a crisis. The idea that he was not my ancestor made me very uncomfortable.

I had a very deep ancestor connection one day.  I felt my grandparents’ presence. It created a powerful connection to my own ancestors. As I listened they explained the Ifa rules to me. I can communicate with, remember and honour my grandparents. They are still interested in my wellbeing. My grandparents have work to do with their own blood-lines. My ancestors are there to play that role for me. I didn’t fully understand, but, I was willing to accept what they were telling me.

I felt powerful emotions coming from my ancestors. I still get goose-bumps when I think about it. It is as if all of my ancestors reached out to my adoptive family with love and gratitude. It was beautiful and overwhelming. I realized that adoption has a profound effect on the ancestral realm. It is as if all the blood-lines have been linked through that love and gratitude.

My ancestors are grateful for my family having taken me in, loved me and supported me. My family and I share a piece of each others' journeys.  Adoptees have a unique perspective on another family. I wonder what that means as new generations of the families are born.

The experience has allowed me to make peace with my dead. I now have a more open connection to my ancestors. They have become an important source of spiritual support in my life.

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How Well Are You Getting Older?

I turned fifty recently. Even when you plan on living to a hundred and five this is middle age. I have been pondering what fifty means to me and here are a few of the thoughts.

Fifty is a critical age where fashion or hairstyles more suited to twenty-somethings look completely ridiculous. I’ve said goodbye to short shorts, speedos and magazine hair forever.

On a more serious note, it has occurred to me over the last several years that my body now demands a gentler and more consistent approach to exercise. I love to run and have had to really pull back on both my speed and time in order to prevent injuries. It is a matter of wanting to run for the rest of my life. Pushing hard now will severely limit the likelihood of that. I have also opted to replace my gym workouts with daily yoga. My body is feeling better than it has in a very long time and I’ve noticed that it seems to be staying relatively tight and fit looking without pushing weights around. I have enough lean muscle mass so building muscle is not a priority, but, flexibility and a healthy spine are.

The last thing I’ve been thinking about is attitude. I’m not upset by birthdays. Even this milestone is just fine. I think it’s important to be realistic about what we can and can’t accomplish given our age, experience, fitness level etc. The real key to staying healthy and happy is to keep growing and moving at whatever age. Beware getting stuck in a rut or wanting things to stay exactly as they are. I will continue to explore my world, myself and all of the wonderful things that they both have to offer until my journey here is done. How can anyone do anything else?

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To Tribe or not to Tribe?

It seems you can’t walk through a bookstore without running into a hundred titles that deal with tribal culture. I’d like to share some thoughts on why that might be true.

In our busy lives we are looking for a smaller group of like minded people to spend time with. We are looking for a deeper kind of adult connection that fosters support and growth while allowing us to contribute. The essence of our attraction to tribal cultures is our desire for community.

Much of the literature exploring this topic idealizes traditional societies. I don’t really have an issue with that. After all, we’re not trying to run off to the jungle to hunt and gather. Well, at least I’m not. We’re trying to learn from the good things that these societies create and to incorporate them in a new way into our modern lives.

The tribe has a deep understanding of its need for every member. Tribes accept diversity within the context of shared values. The flip side of this coin is that the individual learns to understand their part in the larger whole and begins to consider the tribe as they make decisions about their own lives. The individual needs the tribe and is willing to contribute in their unique way.

We are not born into our tribes. We come together based on shared values. What better reason to form a  tribe than to be with people who are like you? Experiencing the way in which our core values play out in other people’s lives gives us a broader understanding of what’s important to us. Understanding and accepting others keeps the tribe open to growth. Your tribe must support growth and development and not force you to conform to a rigid ideal.

The best tribes give us safety, acceptance and challenge us to be better people. They allow us to see the larger picture and to understand our role in it. Do you have a strong circle of close friends? Perhaps you are already a member of a tribe.

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